Is it a coincidence that the last birthday poem we wrote on Teen.com was for Kristen Stewart, and today we’re writing one for Robert Pattinson? No. It’s not. Honestly, we’re just too lazy busy to write a poem for everyone, guys. But to please you Twihards and Robsten fans, we figured now’s as good a time as any to write our ode to RPattz on his very special 26th bday. Clearly we’ve done it before in our dreams and stuff, but this one’s actually written down on paper the internet. So enjoy. And don’t forget to tweet it out to all your fellow Robsten fan friends!
Oh, Robert Pattinson, we remember you from when you were just a young guy
Playing Cedric in Harry Potter — even back then you were shy.
But little did we know that just three short years later
You’d play Edward Cullen and Kristen Stewart? Yup, You’d date her.
So we’re not exactly sure when our crush on you began
But even back then we knew a long time your career would span.
Because look? It’s 2012 and you’ve done so many movies!
And to us, Dear Rob, that’s pretty freakin’ groovy.
Sure, you did Twilight, New Moon and Eclipse,
And With Kstew did you go on lots of romantic trips.
But we’ve still gotta say, Breaking Dawn is our fave
And not that you asked, but we prefer you with a clean shave.
You’re hot, you’re sexy, and your accent is the best
And we just about faint when we see you with your bare chest.
Ok, fine, your abs don’t compare to Jacob Black’s,
But anyone who’s not on Team Edward is whack.
But let’s not forget Water for Elephants and Bel Ami
You can totally do stuff outside of Twilight, ya see?
And aside from movies, though, you’re really nice to look at
But we know you have a girlfriend so um, there’s that.
So as we end this birthday poem to you, Dear Rob,
We just wanna say keep being awesome at your job.
Oh, and please tell Kristen we say hello
And PS, it’s ok to admit you’re a couple, ya know.
Ha! Did you like our ode to Rob? Could you have done better? Tell us below and leave your bday wishes for Robert in the comments!