From Single to It’s Complicated: Assigning One Direction Facebook Relationship Statuses

by: on | in Celebrities | 34 Comments

Facebook relationship statuses were made for nosy people. And by “nosy people,” we mean everybody. Is there anything more universally horrifying/awesome than seeing a person go from “in a relationship” to “single,” or trying to find out what it means when your crush has nothing listed under their relationship status? So much to gossip talk about! If your newsfeed’s been stale lately, have a bit of fun with the boys you’d really stay “Up All Night” Facebook stalking—the dudes of One Direction. What do we think their relationship statuses would read if they were on our friends lists? Read on and find out!

Niall Horan: Single
Spoiler alert: it turns out that Niall is the only boy in the group we’d classify as single. If you’re looking to pounce, though, don’t get your hopes up. He’s engaged in a serious flirtation with Demi Lovato, and we’re totes rooting for Deniall (um, you heard that name here first at Teen.com!), but Niall still wouldn’t list himself as anything more than single. Because even if Demi and Niall are seeing each other, they certainly haven’t reached the level of seriousness or intensity to be Facebook official. You know the drill. FB official = basically married.

WENN.com

Zayn Malik: In a relationship
It’s safe to say that Zayn and girlfriend Perrie Edwards have no problems going public. (Have you seen their public snog PDA pics?) On Facebook, they would be solidly in a relationship, with all the nauseatingly adorable photos to prove it. Cute or excessive? You decide.

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Harry Styles: It’s Complicated
Teenage girls everywhere shed a tear upon discovering that Harry Styles likes women the way he probably likes the wine he can’t have in this country: aged. But that’s not what makes him worthy of the ultimate ambiguous relationship status—it’s his maybe-affair with a much-older, married DJ. Why’d ya have to go and make things so complicated, Harry? Call us when you change your status to “single” and don’t make us feel like singing outdated Avril Lavigne songs.

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Liam Payne: In a domestic partnership
Unless he’s hiding something from us, Liam would not select the “engaged” or “married” options on his Facebook page. But since he’s living with his girlfriend Danielle Peazer and they’ve been dating forever since 2010, they deserve a FB status one up from “in a relationship.” It’s lasting love when you can see someone flossing their teeth on a daily basis and still want to date them.

WENN.com

Louis Tomlinson: In a civil union
Louis has a gorgeous and devoted girlfriend, who he’s been seeing since last fall, but it’s his epic bromance with Harry Styles that would actually warrant a mention on Facebook. Sorry, but that is the real thing. Eleanor Calder, we love you, but please step aside. LOUIS + HARRY 4EVA!!!

WENN.com

Do you agree with our breakdown of 1D’s relationship statuses? Which guy from the band do you want to date the most?

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Comments

34 Responses to "From Single to It’s Complicated: Assigning One Direction Facebook Relationship Statuses"

  1. Teen.com
    Lizzie says:

    Poor Niall.. Ill date you!! I wish I could anyway.. :(

  2. Teen.com
    harry styles future wife says:

    harry is mine so back off everybody!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  3. Teen.com
    supergiraffe100 says:

    Larry Stylinson <3!

  4. Teen.com
    Natalie says:

    I couldn’t agree more with Harry’s status….

    And as much as I love Lou and El’s relationship… Larry Stylinson is forever <3 xD

  5. Teen.com
    Victoria says:

    Deniall= Niall is in denial of dating Demi. Sorry Demi, but Niall is mine. NICTORIA!

  6. Teen.com
    hayley7 says:

    I WANNA MARRY LOUIS THE TOMMO TOMLINSON! :D

  7. Teen.com
    nisreen says:

    who cares i hate when people hater. just because they are a boy band it doesnt mean anything

  8. Teen.com
    Deska says:

    Louis Tomlinson <3

  9. Teen.com
    Chrissy says:

    that is terrible…1: harry can do whatever he wants, hes harry freaking styles. 2. liam is responsible and thats why he has had his gf for so long and will for even longer, and 3. louis should be able to have a freaking relationship without annoying fans telling eleanor to leave because they think louis and harry are actually in a relationship. smh.

  10. Teen.com
    lian says:

    lian, he is a cat, stylish

  11. Teen.com
    Katy Horan says:

    Deniall? What the poo. It’s Nemi. Thank you very much. I DO NOT SHIP THEM

  12. Teen.com
    maria says:

    fuck that girl who is dating liam

    • Teen.com
      Chrissy says:

      that is terrible. she makes him happy.

    • Teen.com
      Ronnie says:

      i agree with Chrissy , she makes him happy and they are a very good couple so stop saying things like that when your just jealous thanks

    • Teen.com
      Ronnie says:

      oh and do you call yourself a fan coz if you do than thats bullshit your more like a directionator to me and everyone else who read your comment

    • Teen.com
      Mrs. Styles says:

      Okay, really? First of all, your just jealous that you’re not with him. Second, Danielle makes Liam really happy, and they’ve already moved in together. Third, Liam gets really mad when people hate on his girlfriend. How would you feel if the person you’re with gets hate because you’re famous and someone’s jealous. You’d feel bad right? Exactly. If you’re jealous, keep it to yourself when you’re at home alone thinking about how you’ll never find someone as caring as Liam. K bye.

  13. Teen.com
    maria says:

    i love liam payne

  14. Teen.com
    Me says:

    larry stylinson is not real.. get over your selves

  15. Teen.com
    xxooxx says:

    Its not Denialll its Nemi!

  16. Teen.com
    Shelby says:

    This is so freaking funny! :) I love them but Louis is hilarious! only he would put in a civil union!
    and niall isn’t dating Demi Yet but it will be cute. Zayn burns me up! :) and I love liam and his girl. Harry is just sad :(

  17. Teen.com
    Ratchet says:

    Harry doesn’t count cause hes a slut

  18. Teen.com
    Kat Horan says:

    LARRY STYLINSON FOREVER!!!!!! <3 ahahaha

  19. Teen.com
    Emma says:

    Avril Lavigne never goes out of date.

  20. Teen.com
    maiyse says:

    you guys are PATHETIC
    stop posting stuff about 1D coz you are not directioners you are directionators

  21. Teen.com
    mikyle says:

    LOL!! all of them are in a relationship while Niall…well maybe I should say hes sort of..haha!! i think seeing them happy makes me smile as a fan… :)

  22. Teen.com
    Leilane says:

    Oh God, I totally agree with Louis status, I f *** love Larry FOREVER. So please Eleanor, Louis belongs to Harry and us, directioners, sorry honey!

  23. Teen.com
    Anisha says:

    that whole “Zayn and Perrie” dating is a publicity stunt… it’s so obvious to everyone who actually pays attention.

  24. Teen.com
    Mrs.OneDirection says:

    Eleanor and Louis are sooo cute! Liam and Danielle need to get married like now! Zayn and Perrie are just made for each other! Harry is like a little teddy bear!! Oh and Niall isn’t single!He just happens to be dating me! we have been going strong for 2 months now! Sorry ladies!

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