We’ve had a whole week to process the season premiere of Glee. And now that another episode’s aired, we’ve slowly come to terms with the fresh setup. (Ya know, minus some of the series regulars.) But even with all the changes, there’s still plenty of ridiculousness to go around. A cry for help, a long-lost family member, a love triangle… Yup, Glee‘s definitely back. Read on for all of the most important events from “Britney 2.0,” then tell us the most ridic storyline in the comments!
1. Brittany breaks down. It’s pretty understandable; she got kicked off the Cheerios for her not-even-possible GPA and her girlfriend/BFF is away in college (but at least we got to see Santana via Skype for .5 seconds!). Because of all this, she suffers a very Britney Spears-like meltdown, lip-syncing a performance of “Gimme More” (nailing Britney’s 2007 VMA costume/”dance” routine) and attempting to shave her head. But then she realizes the error in her ways during the hour-long show and already plans a comeback. K.
2. Rachel’s dance instructor, Cassandra July, tells her she’s not sexy. So she turns up her sex appeal with Britney’s “Oops!… I Did It Again” with hottie Brody Weston. After Rach’s song & dance, however, Cassandra still tells her she’s not sexy, so she lashes out at her in pure Rachel Berry fashion and gets kicked out of class. For that day at least.
3. Brody admits to his crush on Rachel. Is it wrong that we’re kinda hopping on the Team Brachel train? Nothing against Finn, but Brody and Rachel def have chemistry. Plus he travels all the way to Brooklyn — where Rachel and Kurt now reside — to give her flowers and kiss her. (Though she didn’t let the latter happen. Darn.)
4. Jake and Puck meet for the first time. Since Jake’s the new bad boy at McKinley, Mr. Schu calls up Puck to straighten him out. After Puck gives his 5-minute spiel on how he was the original bad-ass, but New Directions made him see the light, yadda yadda yadda, Jake becomes a new man, sorta, and joins the glee club. (P.S. In case you were wondering, Puck’s now in L.A., hooking up with the third runner-up from The Bachelor.)
5. Love triangle alert! The whole Quinn-Finn-Rachel thing’s been over for a while, and we didn’t really care about Will-Emma-Carl, so this fresh blood definitely seems like it’ll get interesting. Jake and Marley’s “You Drive Me Crazy”/”Crazy” mash-up was swoon-worthy. And when he gave her his leather jacket, we melted a little. So sweet! But later we learn that Jake is dating cheerleader Kitty, so Marley has to give the jacket to her. Awkward. (Still, we have faith that Jarley will happen!)