Some of the best songs ever are written about real-life experiences. The decision to have sex, or NOT to have sex for the first time is one of the biggest choices a person makes in his or her lifetime. Part of making that decision is about managing expectation — What will it actually be like? Will you actually feel differently afterward? Will it change your relationship with bae? Those questions are really hard to answer, but the good news is that something that can help exists — the entertainment industry!
"Fifteen," by Taylor Swift
The Most Spot-On Lyric: "And Abigail gave everything she had to a boy who changed his mind / We both cried / 'Cause when you're fifteen and someone tells you they love you / you're gonna believe them"
No matter what rough time you're going through, there's definitely a Taylor song that can help you deal. The crooner doesn't say she had sex in this song off of her album, Fearless, but she does admit that her BFF, Abigail Anderson, lost her virginity to a guy who lost interest after it happened.
While a lot of people choose to have sex thinking it's going to bring them closer to their honey, the sad reality is that sometimes it does just the opposite. This narrative is unfortunately something than many high-school students live through, and realism is something that Tay always depicts perfectly.
Photo: Big Machine Records
"Night Changes," by One Direction
The Most Spot-On Lyric: "Moving too fast / Moon is lighting up her skin / She's falling, doesn't even know it yet / Having no regrets is all that she really wants"
TBH, there are quite a few 1D songs that could be interpreted to be about first-time sex ("No Control" and "Better Than Words," to name some), because those guys are just so darn sexual! But "Night Changes" seems to be the most blatant narrative about losing your virginity. It's got a slower vibe, which makes it more ~emotional~ ... plus it's literally about something changing overnight...like, yourself...sexually.
Photo: Columbia Records
"Teenage Dream," by Katy Perry
The Most Spot-On Lyric: "Let's go all the way tonight / No regrets, just love / We can dance until we die / You and I / We'll be young forever"
This song epitomizes what it feels like to be in love for the first time. The idea of having regrets (or having no regrets) comes up a lot in songs about having sex for the first time. Coincidence? Nope. That's a fear a lot of people have when deciding to do the deed.
Photo: Capitol Records
"White Houses," by Vanessa Carlton
The Most Spot-On Lyric: "My first time, hard to explain / Rush of blood, oh, and a little bit of pain / On a cloudy day, it's more common than you think / He's my first mistake"
Vanessa's definitely released some classics, but "White Houses" is for sure one of her best songs ever. It talks about friendships, love, sex and heartbreak, and and how all of those things connect. It's not a judgmental tale about how having less-than perfect sex and regretting it will ruin your life, but instead says that it sometimes happens and it's okay — you can move forward!
"Don't Tell Me," by Avril Lavigne
The Most Spot-On Lyric: "Don't think that your charm and the fact that your arm is now around my neck / Will get you in my pants / I'll have to kick your ass and make you never forget / I'm gonna ask you to stop, thought I liked you a lot, but I'm really upset / Get out of my head. Get off of my bed. Yeah, that's what I said!"
While most of these songs are about choosing to have sex for the first time, Avril's is about choosing not to, despite her partner's pressure.
In fact, the singer's tune is a pretty good lesson in consent. Despite her telling him that she's not comfortable with losing her virginity yet, her boyfriend continues to push her. Coercing someone into sex is actually rape and this jam highlights how just because you're dating someone does not necessarily mean that you're ready to go all the way — and that's okay!
Photo: Artista Records
"Wet Dreamz," by J. Cole
The Most Spot-On Lyric: "And I ain't never did this before no / I wrote back and said, 'Of course I had sex before' / Knowing I was frontin' / I said I was like a pro baby knowing I was stuntin' / But if I told the truth I knew I'd get played out son / Hadn't been in pu**y since the day I came out one"
This song is literally a step-by-step recollection of the events leading up to J. Cole's sexual awakening, which apparently all started by passing notes in class. It's pretty graphic, definitely funny and, overall, a generally realistic account from a straight dude's P.O.V.
Photo: Dreamville Records
"Losing It," by Never Shout Never
The Most Spot-On Lyric: "My heart was racing / My mind was screaming, 'You've got your whole life to do these things' / But my legs were shaking / My hands were searching for her / In the back seat of my car / I just lost it"
"Losing It" tells the story about a guy losing his virginity at age 16 to a girl who he thought he loved, but she eventually betrays him. It doesn't say what she did, just that the singer can't believe his GF screwed him over.
Photo: Wenn Images